


Ripple

by TwoCrows



Series: After the Storm [8]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V
Genre: Alternate Canon, Gen, Harsh Comfort, Self-Hatred, Suicide Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:41:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27530173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwoCrows/pseuds/TwoCrows
Summary: A normal life…Yuri still isn’t sure whether he really can get used to that. Or if he even has the right to ask for it after everything he has done. To the others he is just a disturbance. A threat.So why the hell does Yuto even bother looking after him?
Relationships: Yuri & Yuto (Yu-Gi-Oh)
Series: After the Storm [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1243310
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	Ripple

A little drip, creating small ripples on the water when it hits the surface. A life which impacts other lives. 

Some of them influence others in a positive way, help to draw out their hidden potential, make them shine greater, more intensely. A ripple which harmonises with them. But others… others are like a large stone which is dropped in the water, breaking the surface and sending everything into turmoil. A turmoil that doesn’t end even after the surface has returned to normal. 

  


  


_Academia_ … Yuri knew he would’ve found a home there, just like all the other broken souls. But he didn’t want to go back. He didn’t want to return to these halls that held so many regrettable memories, so many shadows of the past. He didn’t have the courage to face them. 

He knew he was a coward, simply treading water day by day. Even though Yuya, Yuzu and Serena tried to encourage him… he still didn’t feel comfortable being with the people who had suffered so much because of him. 

He sighed and let his gaze wander over the schoolyard below him. Students were crowding it, forming little groups here and there. Some of them were having lunch, others were just talking. As strange as it was, this seemed to be the only thing which was the same as at academia. Everything else… 

It felt weird, seeing the others strolling through the corridors so casually, not walking tall like future soldiers. There was no hard physical training, no strict discipline and the students didn’t look at each other as if they were just waiting for them to reveal a weakness. Those who broke the school rules even got away with a simple extra essay, instead of being locked up for a few days. 

Everything was so… so irritating. Or… maybe it was him who was being strange. Yes, right. Aside from Yuya and the others everyone gave him a wide berth. Surely they felt there was something off about him. That he was an alien element which didn’t belong in their ordinary, ideal lives. 

And they were right about it, weren’t they? He didn’t have a right to stay here. Sooner or later he would try to deceive them, to taint them. And then he would throw them away. Hurt was the only thing he had ever brought anyone. 

Yuya… Yuri could see his red-green thatch down there on the yard, laughing about something Gongenzaka had said. Even now he was so lively all the time. He was too kind to see. Too kind to see what Yuri was. 

_A monster._

Even back at academia people had called him that, quietly of course and only when they were certain he couldn’t hear them. Only that he didn’t need to hear them. He could read in their eyes what they thought. 

Fear. Unease. Back then he had been proud of evoking it in them, proud of being respected, of being recognised as someone strong, someone who was able to crush them like fleas if he liked to. 

Now it only made him sad and he regretted to have thought that way. He knew there had been nothing he could have done, but still it made him sad he had accepted being alone so easily. Although… that was who he was. Arrogant. Selfish. Alone. He probably didn’t have the right to have any friends. 

“Don’t you want to join them?” 

Yuri turned, surprised at the sound of the voice and gazed into a pair of calm, grey eyes. 

“Why would I?” he snorted. “What are you even doing here? The roof is off limits for students.” 

“You’re one to talk.” 

Yuto closed his eyes and raised his head, letting the sunlight fall on his face. He breathed slowly for a while before he lowered his head again and looked back at Yuri. 

“Did you come because of me?” Yuri asked tentatively. 

He didn’t like Yuto. The boy was always calm, composed. It was hard to read in his eyes, hard to figure out what thoughts were whispering in his head. 

“No”, Yuto replied. “I just didn’t like all the hubbub down there.” He tilted his head. “And what about you?” 

Yuri awkwardly averted his eyes. “S-Something like that.” 

“I see.” 

Yuto fell silent. Yuri opened his mouth and closed it again. Slowly he lowered his gaze and began to fiddle with his sleeve. 

“Hey, Yuto…” he began after a while. 

“Yes?” 

He shot the boy a quick glance and looked away again. “In Heartland… You have carded people as well, haven’t you?” 

“Yes. Academia soldiers”, Yuto answered impassive. “Not many and only when I couldn’t avoid it, but… yes, I did.” 

“Say… What did you feel when you did it?” 

Yuto remained silent for a long while, his gaze pensive as it drifted off into the distance. “I’m not entirely sure anymore. Anger. Hatred, I guess. I wanted to stop them from hurting any more of my friends and the people I lived with.” 

Yuri drew in a deep breath and looked up at the whitish-blue sky above. Then a hoarse laughter rose in his throat. “I see”, he muttered. “I… I know exactly what I felt. It was joy. The feeling of triumph. Pride… Guess I really am a monster.” He chuckled again, although his body felt like it was moved by some godly puppeteer. 

“Do you regret it?” 

“What?” He gave Yuto a quick glance. To his surprise the boy’s gaze was serious and without any hint of irony. 

“Do you regret it?” 

Yuri smiled wanly. “Yes. I guess, I do.” 

“Then you aren’t a monster. I have met enough people who didn’t regret a thing they’ve done.” 

Yuri almost choked. His chest grew tight and it was getting hard to breathe. “You don’t really mean that.” 

“Yes, I do. As long as one feels regret, that is proof they haven’t lost their humanity yet.” 

Yuri made a grimace and cast down his eyes. Each of Yuto’s words hurt, like he was driving a nail through his heart. “Spare me your sympathy. I am not a naïve fool who thinks it would change anything they’ve done if they just feel enough regret. Life doesn’t work like that.” 

When Yuto didn’t answer, Yuri looked up. The dark-haired boy was standing silently, gazing into the distance. The wind played with his shirt. After a few seconds he stepped to the edge of the roof and looked down at the yard. 

“A while ago Ruri came to me in the middle of the night”, he began quietly. “She was really distraught and muttered something about a nightmare. I tried to comfort her, but it felt like hours before she stopped shaking.” He gave Yuri a sidelong glance. “She dreamt about that night. It has left a scar in her soul which will never fully disappear.” He paused and watched the small figures below. “You can’t do anything to take that burden from her. If you ask me whether I hate you for that…” He sighed. “I am not sure.” 

Yuri swallowed. “I… I see. I guess you have every reason to hate me.” 

_A stone which is dropped in the water, breaking the surface and sending everything into turmoil._

“It would be better for you if I wasn’t here at all.” 

Yuto gazed at him for a few seconds. “Is that what you think? I’m sorry, but…” He took a quick step and suddenly Yuri hit the floor. “I really hate that attitude of yours.” 

Surprised he held his cheek. Yuto… Yuto had really punched him. 

He raised his head and both of them stared at each other. The school bell rang, but none of them made a move. Slowly the noise from below trickled away as the students returned inside. 

“Don’t you want to join them?” Yuri asked with a wan smile. “You’re being late.” 

Anger crept over Yuto’s face and one moment later he was over him, grabbing him by the collar. “That’s exactly what I mean”, he growled. “Stop being so damn torpid! Just wallowing in self-pity won’t change anything!” 

Yuri didn’t respond, merely smiling back. Yuto’s expression darkened. 

“If you want to die, then do it, here and now. If you don’t, then start doing something to make up for your wrongdoings.” 

They stared at each other for another few seconds, their faces locked only inches apart. Yuri could feel Yuto’s heavy breath on his neck. Then the boy let go of him. Yuri stayed where he was, back resting on the roof, and gazed up at Yuto’s silhouette, set dark against the afternoon sun. Then the boy moved away, walked to the door that lead inside the building. 

Yuri rolled to his feet. Slowly his steps led him towards the edge. 

So many people had suffered because of him. Ruri… Rin… Yugo… Yuya… All the people he had carded… Surely they would be happy if he didn’t exist anymore. He owed it to them, didn’t he? 

He stepped on the edge. 

Just one step. Just one step between life and death. He wondered how many would be waiting for him in hell. 

He took a deep breath and raised his foot. 

_Beneath that mask of yours I have seen something that felt… gentle and warm. So I don’t think you’re a bad person after all._

_Everyone deserves to have a friend. And that’s why… I want to be yours._

Slowly he let out the breath and stepped back from the edge. Then he turned around. 

“What’s wrong?” Yuto asked from the door. “Are you afraid?” 

Yuri looked at him for a moment. Then he shook his head. “No. That’s not it.” 

Yuto considered him for a while before he smiled. “I’m glad that’s the decision you’ve made.” 

Yuri cracked a sad smile as well. “You know, Yuto”, he began as he followed him inside. “I really can’t stand honest people like you.” 


End file.
